It is mid November, I don’t know who made it a ‘no shave’ month for men. The pressure to keep cool beards is giving genetically challenged men with smooth chins a series of sleepless nights. When girlfriends take selfies with their boys and post them on IG with that caption of ‘no shave November for bae’, you feel bad because you have no beards to show off.
Let me start by reminding you that some things are genetically passed to you and you have less control over them. Nobody can criticize you or make you feel less of man for not being too tall, or having a certain color or not joining the beard gang. Criticism should be on something you can change on and not a genetic trait. I am a hairy dude, I got fur all over my body like the biblical Jacob or was it Esau? I can’t remember who among them had hair or who stole the blessing from the other. But you can see that this discrimination against non-bearded men started way back. And it has gotten even worse.
I was hanging out with three brothers a few weeks back on a Friday afternoon after a long week and of course as tradition dictates, when you meet new people they have to properly introduce themselves to you. The guys were full of love and when they finished saying their names, one of them reminded me that they are truly brothers and it is just that he doesn’t have beards like the rest. Yes, he was joking but that got my attention. Small insecurities rarely pass my radar. And then November came and I started seeing memes all over WhatsApp making fun of hommies with no beards. I got fed up.
I don’t understand how not being bearded can be the only difference between you and your siblings?? It doesn’t sound bro, it murmurs. Yes, my hommie Georgie was just joking but I found it funny how guys have been brainwashed into growing beards. I have lots of beards and my small brother has no beards at all. However, his hair can get very long and he can even keep dreadlocks. I can keep my hair long too but not to that level. I would love to keep my hair long like that of a Latin so that I can adopt some dope hairstyles. Long hair is good for styling but not everyone can grow them. And so are beards. Do not start having funny patches of hair on your chin with an effort to join team beard. It is not necessary.
I know chics are crazy about beards. It shows badassness. But other things can show your bad too. You can keep some cool dreads, get your confidence up, show some great fashion sense, have some deep voice, I got a soprano with a little bass, if at all there is something like that. It is the best description for my voice. You see, my dad and my brother got very deep voices, when they speak, the house literally shake. You know the type of voices you hear on voice ads, yes those ones. But they are not as tall as me. What I am trying to say is that it is all but genetics. Even though you can train your voice to be great. I have been training my voice and auditioning for voice overs. I was talking to someone over the phone and they said my voice is very clear, you see. I am getting somewhere. Too bad because I don’t know how you can train your beards. Unless you decide to have hair implants. Please stay off such things. You don’t need the stress.
The beard look and the undercut hairstyle was there back in the days and Hollywood brought it back. Now everybody is crazy over it but I can tell you that not everything on TV is to be copied and tried. A certain look is usually meant for a specific character. You can create your own look. Or rather you can show off other unique features that you have. Chics are very good at this. She will show you some big bust if that’s her greatest asset or she might put on some crazy eyelashes if she has sexy eyes. Or she can wear booty shoots if she has nice legs etc. Do the same hommie, stop showing your beards only. You can show your intelligence if you have razor sharp intellect, or you can show her some dope painting if you are an artist. Or you can sing for her if you have good vocals etc. Or you can just keep some cool beards if you have them.
Lots of love!
Papito
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