It is good to meet a gal, a fly chic or a great gal. and it sucks when you lose a gal. We don’t like losing things, especially things we have worked hard to get or are firmly in our possession or things we feel like were in our hands slipping away. Most things we lose like money or possessions can be replaced. Even friends, girlfriends, and jobs can be replaced once lost. However, time cannot be replaced and thus if you were to lose a gal, one important thing to be aware of is losing a lot of time getting her back.
You get emotionally attached to the people in your life. In fact, you get so attached that losing them will drive you up the wall for a few days or even months before you completely get over them. Sometimes never for some people. There are people still reminiscing or fantasizing about the memories they shared with their lovers decades ago. Their lovers left a huge imprint on them they are yet to get over. It is like a tattoo left in their hearts and soul that they can’t erase.
You don’t stop living. Life goes on.
In life, you shall sometimes lose one too many, a game, a bet, a pet, a gig, a friend, a lover, a spouse, or a family member. That’s just the nature of things. We lose things more as we get older. Some things get naturally taken away from you. You lose your youth, you lose your hair, you lose people you love and it is mostly out of your control. The only time you lose things within your control is when you fuck up and mess up big time.
Above all, the secret to losing is to let go. There is no other thing to do than to just let go of that which is slipping off your hands or retreating away from you or has been taken away from you by natural circumstances. You can lose yourself trying to hold onto things that are long gone and out of reach. Let me tell you a little story, I once had a relative, my aunt’s mother-in-law who lost her son who was my aunt’s husband. My aunt remained firm in the face of this setback as my family members tend to. However, the husband’s mother couldn’t control herself, she cried a river over her son’s death and couldn’t bear the pain. She eventually passed away 2 months later as a result of her son’s death. It was too much for her to take in. She couldn’t let go of her son. That’s just one case of many people who refused to let go of a loved one and ended up destroying themselves in the process.
If you are to achieve anything meaningful in this life, you will have to learn to let go and free your mind to new beginnings. You don’t remember the job or gig you lost 10 years ago because you replaced it with a better one or moved on to other things, it seems like a distant memory now. Yes, in the moment you lost it, you were confused and even shocked not knowing what to do. And at such a moment, it is not good to act at all, it is okay to step back for a minute and process what just happened before forging a way forward. Not live in that moment of loss forever, don’t mourn for too long. And don’t rush to move on either because you are emotional and you can make an emotional decision that might be not too good for you.
OBSESSION CAN KILL YOU
It will send you to an early grave. Don’t be obsessive or even too possessive with your lover because they might want to end things at some point or you might need to cut them off at some point. And because you are too much into them, it becomes a bit complex to end things on an amicable ground. You will lose lovers as long as you are dating. Only a small percentage of people marry their first love. The majority of us will sample the dating pool for a while before deciding to lock down one person, even after locking a partner, the game is usually not over for many people. We will have clandestine lovers on the side. So the ability to take a loss is something you will have to learn if you don’t have it.
Even if you don’t lose a lover you already have, while competing for lovers in the sexual marketplace, you lose to other people you were not aware of who were in the picture. The gal who rejects you probably chose another man. If you are a lady, the man who didn’t date you or refused to marry you was snatched by another woman. And that’s just the life some time. Don’t be mad.
Most people can’t take a loss, even those accustomed to taking losses still find it hard to stomach a new loss. The mind is not wired to take losses for so long. Psycho people get violent when losing or melodramatic to try and turn things around. That is very weird. Never be a sour loser.
A sour loser is childish. Train your mind to accept losses. I like winning, I don’t like losing. Whenever I lose I see it as a learning opportunity and not a loss. There is no winning without a couple of losses here and there. Only Floyd Mayweather has never had a loss. The rest of us have had to take a loss, lick our wounds, and move on. I know of parents who insist their kids play at least one sport so that they can learn how to lose at a time. As much as they will also learn how to win.
Everyone plans to win, no one plans to lose. Or very few plan to lose. It will be better if you also think of what can happen if you lose so that it doesn’t get you off guard when you catch one.
Oh, I just forgot, another person who never loses is Dj Khaled, he had that song “All I Do is Win”. It came out when I was just done with high school and it was a banger. I am sure Khaled has lost too, he just doesn’t think of it.
To more wins!
Slade
