The man leads, and the lady follows. That’s the nature of any respectable courtship. But the roles get reversed in certain situations. There are moments when it is okay for the lady to ask a man out. That’s what we want to look at in this article. When you have a gal chasing after you for a date or intimacy, it can be thrilling. And some men can be reluctant or dumbfounded in such situations.
A man can be passive or shy or oblivious to a woman’s signals and thus force a woman to act masculine. That’s a very common phenomenon in modern dating where the men seem emasculated and the women empowered tenfold. In certain cultures, the men don’t seem to bother with women at all and the females are forced to take the lead. In fact, in the current sexual marketplace, men seem to be retreating from the game by being apathetic about dating and business in general. We have talked about men going their own way in the past on this site. However, the problem with women taking the lead, whether in dating or government is that women are inherently not talented in leading. And if you let a woman decide where to take you for a date, it won’t be an ideal place for a proper date.
You need to set up your dates in a convenient manner that leads things towards intimacy. Leaving it to a woman to set up a date is not a smart thing. Besides, a woman’s motivation for a date is in contradiction to a man’s. So, the best thing is for you as a man to set up the date and steer things towards intimacy rather than leave it to the woman. Just be a man.
All that aside, let’s look at three situations where the woman can ask you out.
When you are Dormant and Reluctant
A man can be passive and inactive in dating and a woman around him is willing to take things further with him. Shy guys and young guys who are still unsure of what to do around women will get this a lot. If you are a young, attractive man it is important to realize that women need men in their lives and will try to get you out if you don’t do it. Those gals around you smiling at you, asking you what you have planned for the weekend are signaling you to pick them up or take them out for a date are very serious.
When I was young and with poor mating instincts, gals would ask me “What I have planned for the weekend” and I would look at it as a harmless question. Now that I am grown and know better, I understand that it was an invitation.
When you are Very Attractive and Rare
I once went out with a West African friend of mine to a gym I frequent and I introduced him to a couple of my gym buddies. I introduced him to this particular lady and they exchanged contacts. Later on, the lady asked my buddy if she can take him out. That was quite an eye-opener, the guy was a foreigner and attractive so that makes him a rare species. When you are such a unicorn, women will definitely want to seize the tiniest opportunity they have with you that they can get and will literally do anything for you and with you.
Rarely would a woman approach you and ask you out, out of the blue. In my friend’s scenario, I introduced them and mentioned to the gal that he is a foreigner so the rapport was already established. From there on, the lady felt comfortable to ask him out.
When you get these situations where the lady is the one pushing for a date, it is usually a situation where an approach had been made by the guy and the guy came on impressively leaving a great impression on a lady. It leaves a lady with no choice but to push for a date. If you can turn yourself into a highly attractive, rare man you will start to have a similar effect on women.
If a lady has rejected you in the past and is suddenly asking you to take her to an event or join her for a hike or any social gathering, that doesn’t count. Don’t confuse that with what I am talking about here. This is a scenario where a gal you met or was introduced to is pushing for one-on-one date with you and her in a restaurant a club or a dive bar. Or sometimes she even asks to come over for a cookout. That is quite direct if you ask me. It rarely happens but it can.
One thing to keep in mind is that even if a gal is asking you out, she will rarely be direct like a man unless she among the 1 percent of women who are aggressive and go for the men they want. Most of the time, she will just drop hints that she is free on a certain day or won’t mind seeing you soon, or wants to spend some time with you. If you get these signals, you better hurry up and grab them before that window closes. Such gals who are primed and ready to go don’t usually want to wait for too long. Women generally don’t wait for you for too long, the clock ticks louder for that gender.
If you had Asked her out in the past and she was busy?
A lady can also ask you if you had flirted with her in the past, planned to go out but something happened, maybe she got busy or you got sidetracked by other things, and unforeseen circumstances or wildcards popped up and you didn’t go out. She can circle back later on to you ready to go out and ask for a date.
In other instances, you might have met her when she was dating someone else. She had a boyfriend she was on the verge of breaking up with and she liked you but couldn’t go out with you. Now she has broken up with him and is ready to go out again and meet new people. Your name comes up first considering the good impression you left on her. Just go ahead and get your woman brother.
Women do ask men out or ask men for intimacy indirectly if there will be less or no damage to their reputation. As long as there is comfort, more women nowadays have no problem with asking a man out. When you get it, don’t be alarmed or shook, just accept it if you are also interested. Don’t hesitate. Above all, it is better to be in-charge, don’t wait to be asked out, just ask her out yourself.
Happy dating.
